She closed her eyes and breathed out heavily as she tried to calm down. It was just an innocent message. For now… She tried to relax her hand as it hovered over the mouse pad. She dropped her head, giving into her doubts. As she placed her hand on the pad to close out the window on the screen she heard it click. Her hand shot to her mouth in horror. What had she just done?
———-
Robin sat in the driver’s seat of the family van as she drove her husband of fifteen years to the airport. They left the children at home with his sister so they could enjoy their last moments together without distraction. Henry fiddled with his tickets in the heavy silence. He cleared his throat, “I’ve been meaning to talk to you about something.” Robin frowned, she didn’t like how this was starting.
“What is it?” “Well,” he sighed hard. “Never mind.” She looked over at him. He’d seen that look plenty of times over the years. He already started, he might as well finish. “I’m worried about you,” he said. “What? Why? We’ll all be fine honey, I promise!” she patted him on the leg. “This is a big deal for you, you shouldn’t worry about us.” “I’m not worried about the kids. I know they’re in good hands. I’m really going to miss them though.” he choked up on the end of his sentence.
“Aww…” Robin cooed to him from the drivers seat and squeezed his leg. Her face become quizzical, “Why are you worried about me?” Henry cleared his throat again. “Well…” “Yes? What is it Hen?” “I just know how you really need to connect. With people. With me I mean.” “Okay…?” Robin wasn’t following. “Intimately.” He tried to clarify. “You mean sex?” she asked him bluntly. “Yeah. I guess.”
“Of course I love having sex with you!” she said, as if he shouldn’t be questioning it. He shifted in his seat, “That’s not what I mean.” Robin searched his words, looking for a thread that would lead her into his mind. “I mean that I am worried that the lack of intimacy is going to get to you. It’s going to be hard for you.” He rushed through his explanation. “I will be doing all of these new and wonderful things that can distract me from missing you on some level, but you’ll be at home carrying on your life. Our life. Except I won’t be there to hold you at night. To kiss you and…” “Put your dick in me?” Robin teased. “Yeah.” he smiled at her.
“What I’m saying is that, I think that if you don’t have that intimacy you might go crazy.” They pulled up to the terminal as Robin was finally starting to get what she thought her husband was saying. “Wait, are you saying you think I might cheat on you?” “No,” Henry looked at her. “Of course not.” “Then you lost me babe.” she was frustrated with the way he was painting the picture. He leaned over and kissed her long and hard, the last kiss that they would share for three months. They both trembled as they held back the tears. Henry climbed out and retrieved his suit case from the sliding door behind him. “I’m saying that maybe you should.”
———-
As she searched for some way to delete her message, the computer dinged and a icon popped up indicating a reply. Whatever horror she suffered from before was now far worse. How could she have possibly picked a time to message him while he was currently online? She slammed down the screen of the laptop and held her hands on top of it. The message waited inside to be read. If she never opened the laptop again nothing would happen, right? She got up from the desk, turning at the doorway to be sure that the laptop remained closed.
———-
The first week away from Henry was excruciating. He called every evening to talk to the children and to Robin, but his voice was far from making up for the lack of his presence. His business venture in Europe was guaranteed to expand their market, doubling the profits if not more. It was a necessity for the livelihood of their family as well as the other partners in the company, she couldn’t blame him. She missed him terribly though.
The second week was easier as they all rolled into a routine. Henry’s absence was felt, but everyone had their tasks at home. It was during the second week that he brought up their last conversation before he had left. “Did you put any more thought into what I suggested?” he asked. “No. I don’t even want to think about that right now?” “When will you?” The truth was, she couldn’t stop thinking about it. Every day Robin struggled with the implications of doing what Henry had suggested. “I don’t know Hen, please don’t ask me about it again.” “Alright. I love you Robin. I really do,” was the last words he would speak on the matter.
On the third week they tried phone sex. Something they hadn’t done together since both were in college. They studied in separate states and were only able to get together in person every other weekend. It was awkward to be engaging each other over the phone as adults. “Are you touching yourself?” he asked. “Yes.” she whispered. “Where?” “On the bed.” Where did he think she was? Henry laughed on the other end, “I meant on your body.” “Oh!” she felt silly, “Between my legs.”
“Are you touching your pussy?” he asked bluntly. “Henry!” “Well? Come on Robin, we both need this!” He was frustrated with her effort. “Yes I am.” she tried her best to be in the moment with her husband that was so far away. They spent the rest of the time breathing heavily and moaning in each others ears. “I’m going to cum!” he moaned into the phone followed by a deep groan, something Robin never knew she could miss so badly. Tears ran down her cheeks as she listened to her husband pant and catch his breath.
After a month, it hurt too much to talk to him. Robin simply filled him in on the details of their daily life and Henry did the equivalent in return. Whenever he tried to suggest phone sex or the conversation got too sentimental, she would say she was tired and hurried to get off the phone. Each night after these phone calls she cried herself to sleep. She hated that he knew her so well; that he knew she would fall apart without personal intimacy. He was right and maybe what he suggested needed to be done. She would never survive another two months of heartache. Finally she decided to send an online message to an old friend from high school.
———-
Three days had passed since she had sent her message to Gavin. Robin didn’t dare step a foot into the office, let alone lift the screen on the laptop. Finally she convinced herself that it was rude to not respond, even if it was to just thank him for his reply. She filled a glass with wine after the children had gone to bed and made her way into the office. Robin took a deep breath as she lifted the screen. The message hadn’t disappeared. It waited there with it’s glaring red notification symbol. She took a big drink of her wine and clicked on it.
“Robin! So good to hear from you!” it read, “Hope you are well. It’s been a long time! TOO long LOL! I keep up on your family through here. Its good to see your kids grow up and you and Henry enjoying life. Talk to you soon!”
She didn’t know what she had expected, but this certainly was more benign than her imagination. All that fuss over nothing, she shook her head at herself. Now she had to consider the next step. What was the next step? They lived in different cities now, though she had planned to visit her mother in a few weeks, which was within the same metro area as he. If nothing else, that was a good place to start.
“Gavin, thank you for your reply,” she began “I am doing well, thank you. It has been a long time, hasn’t it. Life has a way of getting away from you, doesn’t it. Thank you for keeping up on us, that is sweet of you.” She reread her message. Too many thank yous, she frowned. She hovered over the delete key but decided to leave it as it was. To the end of the message she added “I will be visiting my mom soon if you’d like to get together.” And that was it. She sent the message, closed the laptop, made her way to the kitchen and poured herself another glass of wine.
———-
When Henry called the next night, Robin let him know about the message. “Gavin?” he searched his memory for that name. “Oh right! Didn’t you guys have a thing for each other before we met?” Robin blushed at her husband’s recollection, “Yeah, but we never did anything, we were just friends.” “Did we all go to a movie together or what was that?” his memory was exceptional, but that was part of why he was so successful. “Technically it was a screening for a student film by the girl he was dating.” “Oh, right! Man, that thing was bad!” They shared a laugh that once again sent shooting pains through her heart.
“Anyways, I just wanted to let you know I had sent him a message.” Robin said as she tried to hurry off the phone before she completely lost control of her emotions. “Thanks babe.” Henry replied, “I hope you two can connect.” “Yeah, maybe coffee or something?” she offered. “Or dinner.” “Good night Henry.” “I love you Robin.” She choked on her words and couldn’t squeeze out a reply before hanging up.
———-
Robin waited a few days before she checked for a reply from Gavin. She had been thinking about him while she was at work, but couldn’t get herself to be on the laptop once she was home. She struggled with her memories of being attracted to him at one time, struggled with thoughts of what might have been and wondered what he was like now. Of course she saw pictures of him that he occasionally posted, but many people she once knew from that period of her life had changed quite a bit. Part of her hoped that he had remained the same.
She opened his message. “Robin, I would love to see you and your family! Did you guys want to meet for pizza or something? What do the kids like?” Gavin was always very considerate and nice. Too nice at times, and nice guys finish last, or at least Gavin did with her. Robin made her reply, “It would just be me this time. Can we do dinner?” She hit the send button and realized she didn’t have her antidote of wine next to her, so she rushed out of the room.
A few days passed before Gavin replied. She had checked every day, several times the first day, hoping he would reply. By the time he did reply she was almost upset that he had taken so long. “When and where?” was all that he wrote.
———-
“So where is he taking you to dinner?” Henry asked the next night. “Some new vegetarian place down town. I guess it is very modern or hip or whatever.” she replied. “Oh that’s cool! You know me, I’d have to get a salad!” Robin was familiar with her husband’s tastes; his affinity for a juicy burger or a really good steak. It felt good to be treated to something outside his comfort zone. “Is there any more talk?” he asked timidly, though he told himself that he would leave it alone. “No.” Robin said, “I’m just trying to make it to dinner with a man I’m not married to. That’s all I can think of right now.”
“What am I going to tell my mom?” Robin thought out loud as she was imagining her mother’s nosiness. “Tell her you are going to see Regan.” Henry said as if it were a no-brainer. “She see’s her when I’m not even there!” Robin laughed. “She brings the kids over to mom’s to swim in the pool all the time.” “Oh.” he dug deeper to help his wife, “Why not tell her the truth?” “What?!” Robin freaked out a little. “Just that you’re going to dinner, nothing more.” “I guess…” Henry tried to reason, “Even if she did guess what might happen, she’s open-minded. And you’ve said before that your parents used to tease you about being so clingy. This is the same thing. Just the rated R version.” he made light of the difficult situation and it eased her heart. He knew her so well she couldn’t imagine a life without him.
“Well, I should get back on the road babe,” she said. They said their goodbyes and as she left the rest stop, she never felt both so free and supported at the same time. She told herself she should be sad and guilty, but she couldn’t help but smile and dance to the radio the rest of the way to her mother’s house.
———-
As she waited at her table for Gavin to arrive, Robin looked around the busy restaurant. She couldn’t believe how busy it was, but he did tell her it was new and seemed to be popular. Most of the patrons were couples in a wide range of ages, though most were younger than she. “Happy Valentine’s Day!” said a young blonde server as she arrive at the table, “Can I get you anything to drink while you wait?” “Oh!” gasped Robin, “I totally forgot it was Valentine’s Day.” The server just smiled and waited for a response to her question. “Sorry, water please. Thank you.” As she watched the server move towards her station, Gavin came in to view.
Robin stood up to greet him with a hug with him first producing a single red rose. “A guy by the door was selling them.” he explained, in a tone that seemed as though we was embarrassed. “That’s sweet of you, thank you.” She shrugged off the awkward moment and gave him a good squeeze. “You look really good!” She said as she sat back down. “You do too,” Gavin paused a moment as he took his seat then added “It so nice to see you again. You always look so pretty.”
Robin laughed, though she tried to take the compliment seriously. “Thank you. I got us some water,” she said as the server returned. “I’ll give you two a few minutes to look over the menu.” she smiled and rushed away to another table that needed attention. “I totally forgot it was Valentine’s Day today.” Robin said, “Sorry. Is that weird?” “No!” Gavin was happy to have the excuse to not spend the evening alone. “It’s great! I mean, it’s fine. Not weird at all. I thought it was on purpose…” Gavin trailed off, as he wondered if he had put too much thought into their reunion.
Thick silence filled the space between them despite the dull roar of the dining room as they poured over their menus. After awhile the server returned to take their order and once again disappeared into her station. “I like your shirt. Blouse.” Gavin corrected himself. Robin looked down to find far more cleavage than she was expecting to be there. “Oh, thanks.” she pulled up at the front and tried to cover herself a bit.
“What have you been up to lately?” “Mostly just working.” Gavin was disappointed that he didn’t have much to offer. “I have been going on a lot of hikes I guess,” He added, hoping it would pique her interest a little. “Fun! I need to do more of that.” Robin said, “Does anyone go with you or do you go by yourself?” she searched for a hint that maybe he had someone else in his life. She wasn’t entirely sure if she wanted this adventure to begin or end. “No.” Gavin shoulders dropped. “Maybe we could go sometime during the summer or something?” Robin suggested, but it seemed to only make things worse. “I mean, just you and me,” she added.
“Oh, uh, yeah. That would be fun.” Gavin didn’t know what to say but was rescued by the arrival of their dinner. They ate mostly in silence, only offering the occasional comment about how good their food was. After awhile Robin realized that Gavin was never going to make a move. He was just too nice. If anything were to happen, it would have to be her that started it.
“Gavin, I know this is going to sound really bad or weird or whatever, but I really want to kiss you.” Gavin nearly choked on his water. “Can I kiss you?” she asked bluntly. “Uh…” he wasn’t sure how to answer, though he knew his heart was saying yes. “Now?” she had to force the issue if she wanted results. “Okay.” he was still hesitant as he leaned forward, unblinking like a nervous teenager. Robin leaned toward him, grabbed him by his shirt and pulled him into her. She melted as their lips found each other, both of them letting out a soft moan. She tested her courage by darting her tongue across his bottom lip. Caught by surprise he opened his mouth which she took as invitation, pressing more of her tongue into his mouth to duel his own.
As they broke free they took in deep breaths. They tried to avoid the eyes of the surrounding tables, which were mostly mixed with happy thoughts of watching two people enjoy each other in a public display of affection. “I, I..” Gavin searched for some sort of response that wouldn’t sound completely stupid as he smoothed his shirt.
“Can we go?” Robin asked. Now that she started, she wanted things to keep moving before either one of them backed out. “We don’t have the bill.” he tried to explain, though she offered “It couldn’t be any more than thirty dollars.” She grabbed her purse from beneath the table and pulled out two twenty dollar bills. She tossed them on the table grabbed her things and headed for the door. Stunned, Gavin grabbed his jacket, nearly toppling his chair and rushed after her.
He finally caught up with her outside in the parking lot. “Where’s your car?” she asked him frantically. “The red pickup over there.” he seemed confused and had to catch up again as she rushed off in that direction. Gavin unlocked the doors remotely once he was done fumbling with the keys and she climbed into the passengers side. Once he had closed his door she pulled him in again for a long deep kiss. This time he reciprocated with his own tongue, years of trapped passion finally getting a moment of release.
“What are we doing?” Gavin finally squeezed out, as much as it killed him to stop kissing a woman he had wanted for years. Robin couldn’t blame him. He was a good, honest man besides being attractive. It only made sense that he should want to save her from ruining her marriage. “I’m not sure,” she breathed from the darkness of the cab. “I already talked to Henry about it though.” she offered. “What?” Gavin was stunned, “Talked to him about what?” “This. Us.” she paused as she tried to find words that would be encouraging instead of dejecting.
“We didn’t really talk about what you and I might do,” she fidgeted with the buttons on her coat, and picked off stray hairs as she talked. “But he knows I need this.” “Need what?” he still wasn’t sure what was going on. “Whatever this is,” she shrugged. His heart and his mind raced but he finally felt like he was catching on. “Let’s go back to my place then.” Robin didn’t answer, but Gavin took that as her agreeing, so he started the truck and they left.
They were barely in the door of his studio apartment before their hands began tearing at each others clothing while their mouths locked and their tongues danced. Gavin’s jacket was easily removed, but the button’s on Robin’s proved to be more difficult. She slapped his hands away so that she could do it herself. She needed to be free, she needed to fly, and she wasn’t going to wait for him to let her loose. After she dropped her jacket to the floor, she undid a few buttons on her blouse then pulled it over her head. Robin then attacked Gavin, removing his shirt with force, then kissed at his bare chest as she worked the button on his jeans.
As the disrobing dance continued through the apartment, they bumped into tables and chairs, upsetting items and knocking some to the floor. Once his pants were undone Robin, slid them down to the floor along with his boxers. His anticipation and their combined efforts of lust already had him hard and wanting. She wrapped her hand around the base of his cock and took him into her mouth. Gavin grabbed the couch as he moaned and his legs weakened. Robin worked her tongue around the head and occasionally took him deep into her mouth, farther than he thought was even possible. Robin obviously had plenty of practice from giving her husband blowjobs, and she also clearly enjoyed the feel of a cock in her mouth.
Leaning into the couch even more, Gavin’s breathing quickened as his legs shook. Robin knew he was getting close, so she moved her mouth upward, across his stomach and chest, finding his mouth once more. He grabbed at her breasts through her bra, trying to pull them out of the cups. She pulled at her shoulder straps, slipping out her arms. It was then that he finally accomplished his task. Her hard nipples begged for attention.
Gavin pulled at the them and pinched them between his fingers making Robin whimper. “Ow! No.” she gasped, “Suck on them.” He took her into his mouth, sucking and licking one nipple and then the other. Robin grabbed a fist full of his short hair and held him in place, her head thrown back in pleasure. She looked down at him and breathed “The bed.” “Huh?” he said with a mouthful of her left tit. “Let’s go to the bed!”
The bachelor’s unmade bed was quickly stripped of the sheet and comforter by Robin. She pulled Gavin by the arm and flung him on the bed. Robin danced out of her denim skirt and panties and crawled over his body, taking his cock into her mouth again, making sure he was good and hard before they fucked. He reached for her breasts as her head bobbed up and down. “Do you have a condom?” she asked, saliva dripping to her chin as her hands pumped his dick. “My pants,” he groaned and pointed across the apartment.
“Were you planning on fucking me?” she asked as she made her way to where the pants were discarded earlier. “I had hoped!” he admitted. To him, Valentine’s Day dinner seemed like it needed to be followed by sex. “Cheeky!” Robin called as she fished in his pockets. She came back with the condom, taking it out of the packaging on the way and sliding it onto Gavin’s cock with expert skill. She straddled his body and guided him into her dripping pussy. They both moaned with pleasure as he slid into her.
“Jeezus you’re tight!” Gavin hadn’t expected that for some reason. “Just because I’m a mom and have been married for fifteen years doesn’t mean I have to be loose!” Robin put her hands on her hips, still perched on top of his cock, bra around her waist. He lay beneath her, stunned, not knowing what to say. She flashed a crooked smile and began to grind her hips into his. “Uhhn…” Gavin’s head tilted back as she worked her magic. Time and time again she showed off the techniques she had perfected over the years.
Robin hadn’t expected her orgasm to come so quickly, but the time away from her husband had obviously left a void. She needed cock. Her fingers and various dildos from her nightstand could never make up for the hot, hard flesh of a dick. She bounced with vigor on top Gavin as she dug her nails into his thighs behind her. “Oh. My. God.” she breathed as Gavin groaned and matched her orgasm with his own.
She leaned forward and kissed him on the forehead. “Thank you,” Robin said embracing him, “I needed that.” “Me too,” Gavin agreed, “That was really good.” “Ha! What did you expect?” she teased, slapping him on the chest. “I always expected you to be good.” He looked into her eyes and smiled. Years of day dreaming when they were younger never faded as they became adults and lived separate lives hundreds of miles apart.
“Can you come see me in a couple weeks?” Robin asked as she climbed off of him and made her way to the bathroom to freshen up. “Really?” Gavin was stunned. He had assumed this was a one off. “Really.” she called out. “What about Henry?” he asked. “I think he will expect it, but I will ask him if we can do it again anyways.” she leaned against the doorjamb. “You’re going to ask him if we can have sex again?” Gavin couldn’t believe what he was hearing. “Of course!” Robin said, “We talk about everything.” It seemed so simple to her.
“You’re really going to tell him that you cheated on him?” Gavin seemed more worried than he should be considering the situation. “Well, it’s not really cheating if you both agree to the rules, is it?” Robin asked, stepping into her panties and pulling them up. “I guess not.” he shrugged from the bed. “Besides, it was his idea!” Gavin’s mouth hung open, this certainly was both the best and most interesting Valentine’s Day gift he had ever received.
Blogiversary
Today, August 1, 2013 marks my 3 year blogiversary! It has been a very interesting three years. I’ve written roughly 1,350 posts. My blog has been viewed over 4,000 times, the best ever being 104 in one day. Around 300 comments have been left on my blog, all of which I am grateful for. I’ve shut my blog down (briefly) a couple times and have been shut down once by WordPress (knock on wood).
To date, there are seven categories for you to select – Commentary (where i speak frankly), Cooking (which I’ve barely touched), Erotica (my very amateurish attempt), Haiku’s (a favorite of mine), Photography (the world as I see it), Poetry (the bulk of my content, includes Haiku’s), and Reviews (which has been deactivated until I have something more specific to talk about. I used to do toy reviews, but that has since gone by the wayside).
There are approximately 1,300 tags here to help people find what they are looking for. Some of the most popular being butt, cock, flower, haiku, love, naked, poetry, pussy, sea and sex. Some of the most popular search terms that people have used to find my blog are “panitless,” “handjob,” “horny beatniks,” and “beatnik pussy.” The most fun (in my opinion) are “fellatio haiku,” “pantiless sexual parties,” “landlord sees her naked” (see Room for Rent), “best island girls threesomes ever,” “poem her ass was like an onion,” and “beatniks men nude” (maybe I should look into expanding this one… ).
Thank you all so much for joining on this journey. I’ve learned a lot about myself and the world. I have also chatted with some really great bloggers. You’re all very kind and I appreciate you. Thank you for staying tuned.
The Beat.
Posted by Beatnik du Jour on August 1, 2013 in Commentary
Tags: beatnik, blogiversary, butt, cock, commentary, Cooking, erotica, fellatio, flower, haiku, handjob, horny, landlord, love, naked, pantiless, photography, poetry, pussy, Room for Rent, sea, sex, threesome